A Little Planning Goes a Long Way When Vacationing With Your Child

It’s that time of year when most of us are thinking about and planning our summer get-aways with our children. If you are a separated or divorced parent, there is a lot more to think about than just your destination. It’s important to include key elements regarding vacations in the parenting plan you might be in the process of developing or modifying. Doing your due diligence now just might avoid a lot of stress and anxiety with your co-parent down the road.

So, what is the vacation plan that is in your child’s best interests? You and your partner have options. You might choose to set scheduled vacation days during specific time periods like spring or summer break. If you choose to have a schedule, you might find rotating even and odd years to be the most equitable. On the other hand, unscheduled vacations may allow more flexibility. Unscheduled vacations allow each parent a set number of days as long as an express amount of notice is given – for example, you might each be able to take a seven-day vacation if you have given one another 30 days’ notice.

What if you and your co-parent have scheduled vacations for the same date? If you think this might be a recurring possibility, you might consider having priority status in alternating years. Maybe one of you will choose your dates first in odd-numbered years and the other will do so in even-numbered years. Of course, if you fail to choose by a set date (maybe May 1st) then you waive the priority status.

You will want to think about what specific information you and your coparent might want to share with one another regarding your vacations. In doing so, ask yourself what is important to know when your coparent travels with your child. Most people prefer to know the destination and location where the child will be residing. Additionally, it might be important for you to know if travel is via car or flight. Does it matter to you who might be accompanying your child? If so, you will want names of travelers. Perhaps you will want an itinerary of the vacation. Just remember whatever you ask of your coparent will also need to be shared when you travel with your child. Family law attorneys do get complaints from clients who feel a coparent is asking for such detailed information to harass or intrude upon the vacation plan. Finally, it’s essential to establish what amount of communication is allowed between the child and the non-vacationing parent during the vacation. Your child should be able to contact either of you whenever he/she would like, however you will want to know what is reasonable for parent- initiated contact on a vacation and be sure to have a phone number at which you can reach the child. If you are flexible about communication during vacation, it’s good to be careful not to abuse it. A good rule of thumb is to keep contact limited to a brief nightly phone call to hear about their day and say goodnight.                                                    

Since the Pandemic, it is also common to set some rules or expectations with respect to Covid-19 and travel. Certain high-risk areas may be off the table for travel. Perhaps you and your coparent may want your child vaccinated prior to travel (especially dependent upon the destination) and/or proof of vaccination. In the days leading up to the trip, you might both want a negative viral test obtained for your child and/or the parent or other travel companions.

Consider how you feel about your child traveling to an international destination. Most of the time, there are no prohibitions on such travel, in parenting plans, however it is still important to know how passports will work. If you will both cooperate with applications and/or renewals, you will want to go one step further and specify who is going to hold onto the passport. Be sure to follow this up with a sentence that both parents will share the passport as needed.

How does it work when holidays conflict with scheduled vacations? In general, you should not schedule a vacation that conflicts with your coparent’s holiday time. This can be especially challenging in the summer months when you have a brief window of time to travel. However, holidays like Memorial Day, Fourth of July and Labor Day are priority time that need to be considered when planning. Holidays take precedence over vacations so be careful not to infringe on your coparent’s holiday parenting time.

The thought of your child going on vacation with your coparent does not have to create stress or anxiety for you. In fact, this is less likely to happen if you take the time to plan the elements you want included in the vacation provision of your parenting plan. Ask your McGill Law attorney to guide you through this important process. Your team is here for you… give us a call at 402-548-5418 today before you embark on the vacation you and your child deserve!