When parents disagree about a child's gender identity or sexual orientation, what should be a family conversation can quickly become a litigation strategy. A parent who affirms their child may find themselves defending that support in court, not because the law requires it, but because the current political climate has made it possible for opposing counsel to frame affirmation as something controversial rather than what it actually is: consistent with the best available evidence on child welfare.
Anti-LGBTQ+ legislative efforts have escalated at both the federal and state level in recent years. Those efforts shape how arguments are framed, what positions feel viable, and what a judge may or may not consider when making decisions about a child's best interests. A 2025 study published in Family Court Review found that high-conflict custody cases involving transgender and gender-expansive youth are on the rise. A separate study in the same journal in 2019 looked specifically at custody outcomes for affirming parents and found that more than half lost or had custody reduced. That study involved a small sample of ten parents, so it has its limitations—but it is one of the only peer-reviewed studies examining this question directly. Though alarming, these outcomes are not inevitable, but they underscore the importance of having well-informed legal representation from the start.
What This Looks Like in Practice
This issue could come up in any dispute involving the custody and welfare of a minor child or minor children. Regardless of the context, the underlying dynamic is often the same: one parent treats a child's identity as something the other parent caused, encouraged, or imposed, rather than something the child is communicating about themselves.
It may look like a parent alleging that the other parent has an "agenda" or is "confusing" the child or one parent refusing to use the child's chosen name or pronouns during their parenting time. It may also show up in disputes over whether a child should have access to a supportive therapist, a gender-affirming medical provider, or even a school environment that acknowledges who they are.
If you’re navigating a custody situation like this, it may help to talk through your options early: 402-548-5418
The Legislative Climate in Nebraska
Nebraska's approach to LGBTQ+ rights is actively in conflict with what the evidence tells us about how to support LGBTQ+ youth. The Movement Advancement Project gives Nebraska a gender identity policy score of negative 3 out of a possible 26. The state enacted the Let Them Grow Act (LB 574) in 2023, restricting gender-affirming medical care for minors. The Nebraska Supreme Court upheld the law in 2024. In 2025, LB 89 banned transgender student-athletes from participating on teams consistent with their gender identity at both the K-12 and collegiate levels—despite the fact that fewer than ten transgender students had participated in school sports statewide over the previous decade.
The 2026 legislative session introduced LB 730, which would ban transgender individuals from using restrooms matching their gender identity in publicly owned buildings; LB 731, which would create new legal liability for providers offering gender-affirming care; and LB 732, which would act as a full ban on puberty blockers and hormones for minors with gender dysphoria. As of this writing, none of those bills appear to have the votes to overcome a filibuster, but what they represent is significant: a pattern of legislation that disregards the established evidence on LGBTQ+ youth well-being and targets some of the most vulnerable young people in the state.
When legislators pass laws that contradict what major medical organizations recommend, it creates an environment where a parent's decision to support their child can be reframed as reckless, ideological, or harmful. That framing makes its way into custody arguments. It influences what judges hear and what they may be inclined to believe. And the children at the center of these disputes are the ones who pay for it.
What the Research Supports
The research on family acceptance and LGBTQ+ youth outcomes is neither new nor ambiguous.
Research from the Family Acceptance Project at San Francisco State University found that LGB young adults who experienced high levels of family rejection were 8.4 times more likely to have attempted suicide and 5.9 times more likely to report high levels of depression. Conversely, family acceptance during adolescence was a significant predictor of better mental health, higher self-esteem, and lower rates of suicidal ideation.
The Trevor Project's 2022 Nebraska-specific data is illustrative of the same: 50% of LGBTQ youth in Nebraska seriously considered suicide in the past year, including 58% of transgender and nonbinary youth, 15% attempted it, and 85% said recent politics had negatively impacted their well-being.
The American Academy of Pediatrics has taken a clear position. Its 2018 policy statement, reaffirmed in 2023, recommends a gender-affirming model of care that strengthens family resilience, supports young people in their identity development, and opposes conversion therapy. Other major organizations in the medical field—including the AMA, the APA, and the Endocrine Society—have taken the same position. This is not a fringe view within medicine. It is the consensus.
Find Advocacy That Can Read the Room
Cases involving LGBTQ+ youth require more than legal competence. They require an attorney who is genuinely committed to understanding the nuances of these issues.
It is important to find an attorney who is familiar with the research, who knows what the major medical organizations recommend, and who is able to articulate to a judge why a parent affirming their child is a protective factor, not a risk. You should aim to find an attorney who is comfortable with the terminology, does not treat your child’s identity as something that requires justification or explanation, and understands that being strategic about how these issues are presented to a particular judge in a particular courtroom is essential.
As a parent navigating this kind of dispute, you need to feel confident that your lawyer sees your family, especially your child, clearly and is prepared to advocate accordingly.
At McGill Law, we approach these cases with that kind of commitment because supporting your child should not be treated as a liability in a courtroom, it should be recognized and protected as the act of love and responsibility that it is.
What You Can Do (Regardless of Representation)
If you are in, or anticipate ending up in, a custody dispute where your child's identity has become a source of conflict, being proactive matters. Keep records of the supportive care you are providing, such as therapy records, school communications, and recommendations from your child's medical providers. These go a long way in establishing that your approach is grounded in your child's well-being, not ideology. Do not engage with the other side's framing. And, if you are able to, bring in an attorney sooner rather than later to help determine your strategy moving forward.
Learn more about our approach to LGBTQ+ Family law here.
About the Author
Frequently Asked Questions
Can a child's gender identity or sexual orientation be used against a parent in a custody case?
Nebraska's custody standard is the best interests of the child, and a child's gender identity or sexual orientation is not a statutory factor that weighs against a parent. However, the other parent may argue that affirming a child's identity is harmful in some way, and how that argument is framed and responded to can shape the outcome.
What if the other parent refuses to use my child's name or pronouns?
Unfortunately, this is often an issue in these cases. No Nebraska statute specifically requires parents to use a child’s name or pronouns, but a consistent pattern of refusal could be relevant to the best interests analysis, particularly where it is affecting the child's emotional well-being. Documentation from therapists or providers can help support that argument.
Is supporting my child's gender identity considered a risk in court?
The honest answer is that it depends—on the judge, the jurisdiction, how the case is presented, and how familiar the court is with the relevant research. That reality is frustrating, but it is important to understand going in.
What should I document if I think my child's identity could become an issue in my case?
Keep records of communications with your child's therapist, school, and medical providers that reflect the care you are providing. Save any communications from the other parent that show hostility toward or refusal to acknowledge your child's identity. The goal is to build a record that shows your decisions are informed, intentional, and centered on your child's well-being.
Can the court order my child into conversion therapy or restrict access to affirming care?
There is no published Nebraska case where a court has done either, but that does not mean it cannot happen. Nebraska has no statewide ban on conversion therapy and judges have broad discretion over medical and therapeutic decisions in custody matters. Gender-affirming medical care for minors is already heavily restricted under LB 574, and disputes over whether to pursue the care that is still available can become a central issue in parenting plan negotiations, particularly around who holds medical decision-making authority. If there is any risk that the other parent will push for conversion therapy or try to block affirming care, raising the issue early and making sure the court understands the medical consensus is highly recommended.